Learn to Read Own Body III

This is about examples that here taped and unfolded today... "that"
comple-mented (completed) the awareness and allowing to publish this specific topic, and also, to finish the "Learn to read onw body II" writen 4 montsh ago, as follows:

EXAMPLE:

I sit on chair... I judge chair and me.

Chair as not being ergonomic... (I judge chair = thought)
Me as having weak body structure that is easyly hurt by sitting for long hours... (I judge myself = thought)

once this engages in the minf, burning sensation on calves (lower leg) appear... I touch skin on legs... nothing...!! its cold...!! wft!!?!?!

Then
If i focus on the burning sensationm instead of stabilising me with breath as me HERE, skin actualy starts to heat up and... keeping this for several days actualy manifests redness and spontaneus skin tissue infection. Amazing it is.

What is Trancendence... "here".

The Breath and self awareness HERE... with no thoughts.
This happens in awareness (of...) standing up, as I stop this thoughts and judgments (do not allow them in my may) and do Self-Forgiveness.

By stoping the mind(ing) as focusing in who-I-am here... as what i am doing... and as all that surrounds me;

I let go of those 2 points... of judgments...
Then... trancendently... I am able to stay 4, 6 or almost 8 hours sitting continously and
almost no hurting or hotness or pain sensation in the legs.

If not...
i can continue minding... then in less then 10 minutes my legs hurt more than.. "who knows what"

So...I stop the mind.
I trust me as the breath here as life.
Be... Life.
Exist.
Express.
No thougt.
Transcend the physicality.
This develops within finding this trancendence in the most assorted experiences of "daily life".
About That Experiences I will be writing in next posts.

Tourism and Work

Tourism and Vacation... How does it really work.

By "stoping the mind".

Usualy you have a pre-ordained pre-programmed set of knowledge as thoughs manifesting.

Thoughts used your life essence to manifest in the Matrix of the 3D limited existence, thus create it in every monent, as the fucked-up world we live in.

So when you go in vacation, for one moment you forget... and delete all those thoughts that consume you during the year ,thus one ages because of that, life essence depletion.

One sees it as
"Ah so glad i go in vacation and fuck it all.. forget about work."

yes it really works that way...
now see what is causing that tiredness and stress is of the mind.
one only acctually lives 1 month each year, and some even not that.
few that work in self expression, are able to enjoy it and actually dont feel wasted, they have some kind of awareness in self preservation as not using mind a lot.

KISS technic to its exponetial

its actually more than that... its transcendence!
when the true being that is me (you) emerges and actually manifests within awareness, not rationality and intelect, then perfection of life is birthed on the physical, moment after moment.

stopness and hereness keys (within and as music)

stopness (of the mind) and hereness (of self "here") keys ( on playing he keys of the piano lol)

I like music so... something just happened, in process... Something…

FFFFFOOOOOOOOOOkin amazing... !!!

I seted up gear some days ago .. playd a bit...
sound very quiet and i was feeling tired ... end of the day... was late.
so not much pleasent sounds came up.

but today i just played a bit and... something happened ..
but some background first

I had tryed self-expression before lately... in one specific oportunity as music

some weeks ago... at a friends house...


there the awareness within processe... was more on ... 2 specific points

1. i assumed ... i must have no though ... and melodys come out naturaly ( trancendently) and so let me alow to visit this friend his new gear, know a bit more of it and ...and allwing to glinpse that self expression as jamming a bit... ( i hadnt played the piano for years then)

( hey... carefull lol i am not that talented... i have the melody but not the eye-hand movement coordination ability to do it perfectly... i did jam 10 years ago... producing +- 11 tracks, and always used the computer to fix the arranjements... arranje them as fixing them literaly.. no way i could do live performance, no skill on fingers for that... yet ... lol)

2nd. ... my friends pride... trying mno to manifest it as the oposite side of the polaroity... as i saw him trying to things in music because he enys me for what i did... hurts his pride... some dark-and-not-admited background we had with this guy... (mindly speaking) we fought .. mentaly not physicaly... lol ... anyway continuaing

so... i was there.... at those times pretty confidant on what was stoping the mind and not allowing much thoughts and feelings...
meeting that guy, once again, was for centain a self-test... as he is/was/is so fokin EGO-centric...

so i was on the piano and he was changing the sounds browsing the sound program banks of the gear... and finally we setted up one program ( composed sound) in the synth that really pumped my feeling in the music... so i, in one small moment... confidant with no thought... yet ... inatively ignited by the specific sound timbre and frequancy resonance... started playing some cool notes chords... well defined... and exuberantly loud... so for one instant i saw a glinpse of self expression (as i defined it... lol) but .........



inevitably... my friend noticed it and

imediatly huge reactions within in ignated too... (i supose). Because... he got up ... stiff, harsh mean looking. as wanting to look strong... but... certainly looking hugely nervous... or ... hurt pride... or hiding shamed... (lot like gabriel looks sometimes... same exact face expression..lol ...) in rushing to the windows to close them... suposely in shame and worry of what neighboors might think when earing such as lets say... simphonic ... determinded ... impressive exuberant manifestaion "performance" as music ..comming out of his house... and i cares that no one knows him by that... its unsual lol so....

well i realised it like that... because... its what i had too... same kind of reactions when my expression is exuberant... the surrounding world... desestabalizes lol deeeep in foundation...lolllll (found-damn-nation) and built in insecurity as of fearing the reactions of other when expressing in such a free exuberant format (such expression...) ... settles in ... as other people are not used to see us/me as it, so when they see ... they attack as humiliation of ignoring in no consideration... and their pride is hurt as not facing presenciating something that was not at any way expected by them...

(weee extensive SF to go ..whowoooo! what a ride! <---- coolness fooleness hihihihi) i think... also the feeling and impression the sound made, could certainly also ignited that fear of unknown in him... inact natural shyness since what was emited there in even-if tiny moment... was not at all on expected experience... and the "sound frequencys have unknown effects" on peoples minds (llol) as "you could guess..." i have all those above too... and realising it all that in one momente ... completly broke me... and anxiety rose within me... i literaly felt like i was falling braking apart in as roting and then the pain of the anxiety hit me... i stoped and focused on breathing and contineud playing... "nothing!" well... in certain way... i predicted that something would happen. becaue i allowed me to go into the "mouth of the wolf" to see clearly what i had to forgive /process ... but even now .. typing this seem that theres even more specific forgivenes to do... lol . it hurts!!!! ouch!! but continuing... back to the rest of the story ... what really placed me here. typing all this... was my recent experience in music... just a few minutes ago.. playing in my "piano".... my directive principal when allwing me to go into play music in piano.. is presently, to do it in self expression so ... no thoughts... just expression... either amazing or not... usualy it is... when no thoughts are here... but presently i regarded more ... the mechanical... physical aspect of it... i usualy have not very flexible finger movements and it really hard to hit the keys correctly ...at the same time that what i feel is flowing on melodic changes and harmonies... as what we call "feeling" (musical) it requires training for shure... but ... i am here is charing the trancendance i experienced in that... is like... even from one seccond to another... if mind is or not reacting and compounding past feelings and experiences... .... it is the diference between... i playing one arranjement that i took by ear from one old song.. as if, i were doint it for the first time... all crippled and missing the notes/keys... and as-if, i were a complete master super confortable and confidant in placing my fingers on they keys in precise timming and correct note ... correspondly. and i didt it ... so so so defined... "for one moment" i just played so well... some parts of that arranjement... as i never saw me confident doing it before... and all that was required to do it... since i already had it all memorysed .... was to be aware of me here as looking at the keyboard and keys... just realising it presence... nothing more... and allowing the fingers to to correct key in precise timming... and the harmonies and rythm just expressedd amaaaaaaaazingly "fidel" to original lol. so... the first experience i described... is getting a tap on what is me.... as experiencing me as-no-thoughts in-one-moment, which was amaxing... and this second experinc... e was expressing in that same impressive way... as focusing in the awareness-of-HERE... pure-hereness ... As mind... you can call it... it was a confirmation of "what is" (among other things) self-expressing with thought and as awareness of self here .... stoping the mind... so it is not dumbness or dullness or boredong... it is beauty of sound and amazing expression. maybe soon i am able to add to that, all-in-one-monent, the aplication as the breath, and be able to keep it flowing, not only during one single moment... (few seconds), but out far as whole song or a complete hour playing the piano!! lol ))

thats not really hoping... its what i will accept and allow within me expressing .... to happen (exist) as music... me expressing .. i am music ..in-the-moment as me... with no thoughts feelings and emotions of mind as desires and worrys and wanting of playing well

Learn to read own body II

(Writen in April 2008 - Revised and PUBLISHED on 19 August 2008)

The specifics ... how it "works".

Manifestations of interdimentional mind consciouness systems constructs...

PAIN IN KNEE - Personaly... once i have a pain in my left knee... i see that in the moments before... i have allowed myself to express me according to EGO or consciousness... as a mind fuck... allowing me to express according to defend my EGO ... a simple "lol@someone" doesnt cause it... its a bit more sneaky than that... so... once i see I start to have similar pains... i see that i have in recent "times" allowed some behaviours and attitudes that defined me... and that only seek to defend the EGO... not who I am as life unlimited as expression.

LOWER LEGS - Hotness Redness And Infections

See "Learn to read own body III" post... it complements this present writing:

It is "also" is a ... simpton that ... I am not following programmed stuff in daily life - not doing it
MEaning... i thought i had something to do... but i procrastrinated... but instead of supressing (forgeting and forgetting that I have forgotten) i stay aware of "that" I wanted to do... manifesting in the background "in my mind"...

So... within me... it -> generates a friction of the mind consciousness system ... wanting to do/not doing... wanting to do/not doing ... wanting to do/not doing... It compounds as thoughts .. so much that body wont take no more memories of this thoughts...

Upon this compressing and compounding... "Guilt" cames up... as entrapment... as worrys, self judgdements... of ineficincy etc etc etc,...

So.. all that mind shit will dissipate... if it is still allowed... then Imediatly manifests, the release of that as that "illness".

BODY HEATING AS MIND-FUCK RELEASE DISSIPATION... ON OTHER HUMAN BEINGS

I noticed that also it in some beings... exteeeeensive!!!!!
A being I know "personaly", has "hotness" (LOL no.. real ºC hotness!!) in the whole body, after moments that he aparently has brainstorms.
He completely ... heats up... and starts to swet... rivers!! One can see the swet drops falling of his face...nose and his cloths wet. To the point, that he must go "out" (example, if he is on a bar) and take coat off, to cool down.... Amazing this guy. This happens to him like ... No Doctors ever here able to tell him what is going on with him. lol... how surprising ("nooot!")!!!

EYE LID TREMBLING
System construct manifested in eye lid... lack of self awareness 'here' - allowed pressure not stoping the thoughts that originate it.

After some weeks, monitoring it... i found it manifest more extensively when I alowed mannerisms ... see: http://www.desteni.co.za/forum/viewtopic.php?t=6721

Cool! to be aware... i had some SF on this already! Some already unfolding.
Thats "Cool"!


PIMPLES ON SHIN ---

Pimples -> Its Supressed anger...
Shin -> Shame i am IN

LOL... havent found this yet... just became clear as I just wrote this...!! :D

Ok... some legacy awareness on this manifestion:
Some specific situations became aware... A sister had it some years ago to... so.. maybe yes... PROCESS is started some years ago... BODY does not tolerate any more anger within... so after she ended up with her BF... in the next day... all pimples...!! hurt pride... etc etc,, the tipical of relationships... (LOL thats topic another post.. its already a draft)

My pimples I have them on base of nose and shin... Nose is base knowledge as the world is defines... so... I would say ... society fundamentals limitation... and shin... its my accpeted nature... as shame! sculpted from situations in teenage years, that made me became a angry . And THAT Anger became me... as my style and way of being... needing to look rough to be considered strong and stable... Out of fear of not being accepted... oh boy, oh boy, oh boy!!



Before process... health body events

Had kidneys sharp intense painsd !!!!!!! FUUUUUUUCK... I jumped! lol it hurted---
Like someone just pinched kidneys...inside... not in skin above it...

Interdimentionaly i came to know that... that acute pains are release.. body releasing memorys ... similar as crying... anyway; Being KIDneys... the affected point... SEE I was acting like... KIDding myself.... allowing me to manifest as behaviours that... not contribute to my self direction and expression witihn my life.

PINCHED PAIN ON SHOULDER

Yep... lol Had it in the right should lately April 2008... It Imediatly stoped... after going to structural resonance documents and take a look to what it relates ... and becoming aware of what points are due to do self forgiveness... so notes taken (on SF notebook text file)

Fears and anxietys also dissipate with SF
ANXIETY IS FEAR... as pain in solax prexus... just below chest and above belly... inside.

Also called movement (energetic remaining feelings) in solar plexus ... those pains and feeling,
will indicate a point that is being overcommed... In breath or by lacking some self-forgiveness
in some very specific but fulcral point... or... layer that is not yet within awareness on process.

My fingers hurt too... but thats because of too much cliking and typing... all day long... lol
I was not yet able to see what points in my life are contributing to this specificaly... althoug i have some suspitions... "LOL" In another topic/post... it will be expounded.

Learn to read own body

Human body stands-up as life...

So when you use the mind... he warns you.

specific or not...des-eases, illnesses, sorenesses, etc... manifest.
All specific... but... All due to the use of the mind, specific or not.

more on this...

Ahaha.. Ruben.. vloged it also
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d5A6ibSp6zo

no-judgement... tool

No judgement ...in every breath of every moment... absolute...

is actualy, THE main tool, to remain "here", not allowing the mind to manifest.

To remain within and as the entirety of "you" -me here as all-, and to enable the being to not direct attention for what is percieved to be the beeingness of being here.

Once you define you here, acording to what you experience you -around you- you are giving up to the mind allowing "her" to manifest as searching for self, within fear of loss (= lose self).

so... it works by not allowing thoughts to take place in mind, those which, either remove your self expression as directing as rationality-of-the-mind , or either manifest feelings in you, that will restrict and constrict your movement, manifesting you as the mind and not as Self.


Self trust... not defines whatever happens and exists, being is not limited.
Self trus.. enables the most free expression of the being -as-life- within the limitation of the physical.

Mind ... searches for definition for everything... its a system... programed to do that, so that the entirety of the being is not realised, not aware, enslaved, puts limits in everything as definition, which add-up to the own limitations of the physical.

so.. as long as no judgement allowed, you express you as in oneness and equality, in the entirety of you-as-all, in existance.

Cat behaviour is assistance

cat behaviour... affection... need of love... must SF .. yes it worked somehow... if i recall
she mirrors what my mind is trying to manifest when its time to wake up and i felt glued to the bed as needing to feel the body warmth of a girl, if the cat acts all needy then i must look into myself and see what am i feeling, that is the mind.

I still looking at my cat behaviour, to be aware of what she says to me... not only when getting up.

Animals seem to unconditionaly stand up in assiting humans...

but the nuances in their behaviour-changes are so slick... we tend to see it as them,
when really they are mirroring what is accepted and allowed by us humans.

example: i walk through the corridor... the cat in her crazyness puts herself in positions that
i am able to step over her...at risk of braking her a leg, or kicking her inadvertly and really hurt her body, in facing this i can see the reactions within me as feelings... the caring, worrying, the anger, the irritation, bulding up, the fear of her presence,. in jumping in front of what ever i want to do, she is putting her self in my way, wow this phrase is so revealing... she puts her self in my way, to make stop something...
clearly STOP the mind... thus... she sees much more clearly in life transcendence of oneness and equality, because not havving a mind blinding her expression and awareness, so she see´s what i accept and allow as my mind consciousness system to manifest as thoughts and feelings ... much better than i do.

So Matilde... (i would have called you Helena if you were not my mom and sister cat,... ahaha)
i direct my attention to you...to your presence. It prevents me to allow the mind of thougths to manifest, and i thank you for you support as a cat.
:P

Polarity frictions... hidden sub and unconsciousness

So...

still a big issue... on work... the expression must be unconditional...

in relationships too... forgiveness all the time some thought or feeling strikes.
self in reactions to female body still, nothing must be seen as separation. And needs, and desires, in projected self in future, also those projections manifesting here as starting point, thus separation of self, in expectations, and formated social accepted needs and goals as enslavement and manifestation of the mind.

Not easy to describe what was accepted and allowed for, as i was explained, my body was showing me points of the subcounscious and uncounsciousness that still here with me, not allowing me to stand up in self honesty. In this dimentional help, was of great assistance. The mind is so limited in reading the body.

Self trust, as being here as the breath, is of great assistance to go through this fases, is the key to stand up, not allowing the mind to manifest.

Dreams

Ok... letting be aware -as self- that dreams presently represent something that requires
one attention, as something in the beings world that must be directed.

Either the dreams are manifested by dimentions as dimentional help or mind as self standing up.

Either way the show to the being what self must direct in forgiveness and/or what must be self movement to suport self.

Each of the intervient separated manifestations, identified in the dream, is one point where the being as a oportunity to be self honest, standing up as stoping the mind of thoughts and feeling and emotions, and whatever might suport the being in self movement, and suport.

This is my awareness of what desteni exposed about dreams...
"heaven" changed, and dreams are not presently manifesting the mind as programing of the being into enslavement of self below layers of consciouness.

What is here... (?)

So... forget minding what you must do... self!!!

The only way to be self honest... is not to forget what self-honesty is... in oneness and equality... lol

A way to deal with it ism to deal with whatever we must ...in the moment... and live moment after moment.

I come saying this... mostly for the strugle created by the compromises within work and schedules.

The procrastination --as mind act-- manifested extensively by design, that is what i accepted and allowed me to become -- but as presently it is in my control - as self control - and one must not be live as in past within the mind consciousness system as blamming what was lived and experienced when being birthed and rased as a mind consciousness system --" and what a mess!!!" those system are prone to, just look at drug addicts-- so... working my ass out, eliminating procrastination seems a break-through the mind barrier.

The directive principle to this situation... not broadening within i have here in my moments presently, is to go through work and standing up, but mainly do it from the starting point of expression, not regarding wonderings what might happen if i dont do it... as it will be fear of loss, as in fear of losing clients which is fear of losing self by not having money, and fear of not having love because of not having money...

so between doing the work as self expression... and looking closely in what i ever done clearly as self expression it ( looking at... from a self-honesty and oneness with-what-i-was-doing, perspective), there are some diferences, so for now will express with no thought, as much as possible, and see how goes self honesty within a required expression, but eventualy i will become what i see is my native self expression, as long as the starting points are equal and one, with the expression i did as a child when my mind system was not fully developed and infused.

Other points to look at will be how that expression suports this fucked up world we live in.
seems quite castrating point, and something that will supress expression, so in process, will
forgive as much i am able to pin point. But i am not willing to be limited to what my mind expressed as me in this world until now. That is not acceptable.

If i require support, i see dimentional help, and not yet being a portal, but there are other ways o comunicate interdimentionaly, where i can see me from dimentions, and direct me as what my mind might be manifesting... ultimately everyone will do this in self trust in the physical, for the physical is transcended when the mind is not present, and each one of us, as self has the hability to direct self as physical, manifested being.

Life directs
I am life.
I am one and equal with everything and everyone in existence.
I am not limited by the mind constructs.
I express.
I am the moment.
I am here.

A post about timeloops ... is next eventualy... as Self process takes place.
Timeloops wont be allowed.

Self movement as Self response

Now... lately i “felt” like... i am needing dimentional suport way too much… you go (wtf?)

What´s up ... ??!!
Some drastic mediatic event about school teachers and students, recently exploded out in the media…

Went to see some videos about it in the internet, and became amazed by the obscenity of the comments people posted on the videos. Then I started replying to posted some comments… trying to bring some self-honesty awareness upon what people were showin that they were accepting and allowing by posting them. In the next day, I see that every post I posted, was deleted… lol

Wait a minute…now… that’s something wrong!!

Yes!!! but see the problem is not out there… in separation… out side of me… no way

It is here!! Be here… yes.. here. As me… as I am a part of the world we live “in society”.

Where I must look, to assist what I see out there, is actually right here within me… -as self- myself -as what I accept and allow – (and this is valid to any being)

“Any should try to mitigate the world shit…” wtf?? why?? World will face “the shit” as required, according to what was and is accepted an allowed... - no strings attached- -outside of self- to help sort things out, helping existence to become honest in oneness and equality

Life essence which is within and as everyone and everything… is self and will be manifesting in all forms in all places, in all situations, showing the points to be aware, those that must end, change or be created within what is espression on the physical world--- Earth -- somehow.

On forums….

I didn’t even know what I was doing in the forums… my attention was diverted to others feelings – like as if I must try to assist them, since some people seem very attached to mind… and I was not realizing that I have my own struggles within my process here as all to overcome.

So I must turn into my assistance, as the assistant of self instead of assisting others, first! Not doing that also removes some of their opportunity to birth themselves as life… in self trust… by a way of self-response-ability, not constantly recurring to assistance, waiting for other to sort this out… with no self-trust…

The breath application and some perceived dimensional help… ( this I state as self-trusting affirmation), help me to realize within me how life really expresses on the physical. Now… this is confirmed transcendence… also as… the mind wont be able to classify and specify -life-

So…. as soon I start to type this text… my cat starts playing… as I haven’t seen her doing for some days…

… but – it manifested .. no doubt about that. So she assists with her expression. We are both life.

Mind can explain this this!?!?!?

BTW … why must one human rely so much in dimentional beings… enslaving them in the process… as we can take responsibility for our self movement. I don’t want to condicionate the expression of individual beings as they forcing them to assist and support humans become self aware--- well this assumption is made on the basis that they could have others expression to express… but this is still mind systems point of view…

The self-honest perspective is:

self assists self … in self-movement and self-awareness

Summing up…

I am not responsible for others more then I am response-able for myself here

as them, as I am them and not just a part of them,

and then I move and direct myself in becoming life expression.

Hello Word as Self

The criation of this blog, comes in the process, where i am able to give a contribution to change the World.

The most interesting part of this, is that; this change is made, by changing self, within what i accept and allow on our surrounding existence.

Because I AM the world, AS each ONE of YOU, i exist not only as a individual being, but also as truly integrated unified being that manifests "World" here on Earth.

I am one and equal to the world we live in, then; when I change myself, I change the world.

WORLD AND UNIVERSE IS EXISTENCE
SELF IS NOT LIMITED NOR DEFINED BY EXISTENCE.

_____
This process can be started by anyone: watching the Desteni Video Interviews and forum participation, at www.desteni.com.za